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So, no one told me when I began the journey of I-want-to-be-a-writer about all the waiting.



for the right time to write a certain story or manuscript,

for critiques,

for rejections (or that brilliant acceptance!),

for contracts,

for edits,

for more edits,

and that final golden ray of sunshine, to be published.

Waiting is hard.

But, hey, writing is hard.

They go hand in hand, forever racing off into the sunset together. It is what it is. There’s nothing we can do about it except eat ourselves silly or chew our fingernails off. Not the best options. So many of us sit and wonder…

Should we send a nice e-mail asking how things are going?

Should we prod for a bit of information?

Should we reach out, desperately hoping for the answers we crave?

Some submission guidelines state to contact them after a certain amount of time. There you go. Others? So many different opinions from so many different writers. Each driven by unspoken writer “rules”.


I submit that there are no correct answers. Wow. Is that incredibly unhelpful or what? I know. So… it’s been a few months since you queried, since you sent your partial or full ms and you want to “nudge” as we writers so nicely call it… do it if you absolutely have to.

Or maybe, just wait. Agents, editors, and publishers aren’t sitting around staring at your query or ms thinking how fun it will be to… not answer you.

You wait, because it’s part of the job. The part no one tells you about. We all want answers. We all want to think we have some control over our lives, so we can move on with all our knowledge-y knowing stuff.

To be honest, I’m good with waiting. Sure, I get a bit anxious now and then, but I can usually change my focus. I don’t need anyone to hold my hand. I’ll just skip off and play.

My main frustration happens when no one else understands this, when others keep asking if I have news. Don’t I deserve to be in the loop? The loop? I don’t know. When things I should know pop up, I trust that I’ll be put in said loop.

Can’t I just ask a few questions here and there? I suppose, but I’ve never been one to do that. I don’t want to bother all the busy people. And, yes, I’m important. And, yes, I deserve to know about things that impact my life and work. And, yes, answers are good. However, I’m pretty independent. I’ll sit happily in my part of the world and amuse myself.


I trust the process. I give my control to the Great Unknown.