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It’s a miracle that I finally got to blogging today? Well, yes, that.

But no.

My writing. My sitting on the couch and typing words. Before I began this manuscript, I was scared. I hadn’t written anything new (other than short stories) for years. I had drafts to revise and happily did so, but when it came to staring at a blank page…I panicked.

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I knew I could write a book, because I had done so in the past, but the idea was foreign. Weird. HOW DID I DO THIS BEFORE I DON’T KNOW!

But I did it, slowly.

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I put no pressure on myself. No word counts to achieve. No judgement if I couldn’t work my way through that transition. No worry about it being crap… dude, that’s what first drafts are.

I kept at it.

And now…I have found myself at a point where the fear has left. I have been writing consistently. My word count rises at a steady pace, not super fast rocket pace, but not too shabby. I do stare at the screen plenty, searching for the next word or scene, but I’m no longer afraid that my brain will let me down.

I’ve accepted how I work best. Instead of screaming at myself all day to write, I let myself have the time to workout, to do all the chores, to know I will get to the words. A bit of balance between all the things has appeared. I have allotted myself reading time and soon I will be adding drawing time, because I miss it. I write best after dinner, even though I do have the document open during the afternoon, the words flow better after the laundry is done, dinner is eaten and the kitchen is clean, when the dog falls asleep (seriously that is important!) and life slows down.

And now I have a crazy mission. To finish this draft before I get into developmental edits for DOORS. Can I do it?

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Maybe.

I will do my best.

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And for now I will be happy with my little miracle.

 

 

 

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