Tags
anxiety, deadlines, do my best, family, Thanksgiving, thoughts, unfocused, vacation
I don’t know about everyone else, but holidays always throw me off. They chuck me right off my path, rip any plans to shreds, and laugh at me.
And that’s okay. I like holidays.
Last week I was celebrating Thanksgiving with my family. WE HAD THE BEST TIME! We ate yummy food, we laughed, we chatted about life, I got to visit with my nieces (well, three out of four, one was too sick to come), we saw Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them, we played the board game Risk (I was doing okay, until my baby sister wiped me out), and celebrated Christmas early because we won’t be seeing each other then.
I love those moments I get to spend with my parents, my sisters, and nieces. We never know exactly how much time we have left.
But the week leading up to our trip, I tend to freak out. Anxiety flows freely. There are things to do before we leave…cleaning, packing, shopping.
And don’t get me started on taking the dog to the vet to be boarded…that was a disaster. We made it, but WOW what a stressful hour. Dogs are weird.
I don’t like to leave my house, my cats, my routine. I mean, once I’m off, I’m fine, but there is a voice in my head that tells me to STAY HOME, until we leave the driveway. So I’m pretty useless the few days before we go. I can’t focus. I can’t settle. I can’t think.
When we returned, I was tired. Emotionally exhausted from all the visiting. There is laundry, shopping, picking the dog up from the vet (that went smoothly), and getting everything back to how it should be.
So settling back into my routine takes a minute…or several.
Usually, I excuse myself from being a human being during all these moments. Get what needs to be done done and don’t worry about the rest.
Except, there’s this anthology and I have a pretty cool story idea. I want to submit it! But it isn’t written. It should have been written before Thanksgiving, but that didn’t happen.
I got home and should have sat down to finish it, but that didn’t happen. Until yesterday when the story passed 3000 words and I went to bed last night knowing I have one scene THE FINAL AWESOME SCENE left to write.
YEA!
Sure…
But…
Deadline for submissions…SUNDAY. As in this Sunday.
I got this. THIS IS FINE. I will submit it, all they can do is reject it. No biggie.
So Thanksgiving hurled me off course. I wouldn’t do it any differently. So my weird brain made it hard for me to focus, I am me. Fighting against my nature tends to cause more frustration.
I shall carry on. Do the best I can with what I got. As we all should.
