The Finish Line: I Can See It! Can You See It?

Tags

finishing the draft, the end, thoughts, word count, writing

Word count is important as the writing happens. Watching the words grow is a huge part of creating a manuscript. I write down my word count at the end of every day so I can see the progress. One word or 1000 words more and I am a happy writer.

The first 5,000 words…the first 10,000 words…

25,000

50,000

But…

Eventually, the word count doesn’t matter anymore. I still keep track, but am no longer waiting for the next milestone. Scenes click into place. The end of the story comes together.

This is where I am now.

I reached the top of the hill made of words and am on my way down. The scenes come faster in my mind, the emotions run high.

Now, the worries of the manuscript being good enough, of it being what I want, of CAN I EVEN WRITE ANOTHER BOOK all fade. I will get to the end, where all the words sit in a pile waiting for me to mold them into the best book it can be. Revising is easier for me than drafting. Blank pages hold all the fear. Words ready to be changed, deleted, and added to make me happy.

Of course, after I finish, the words will be pushed into a dark corner to wait. Revising works better when I forget what I’ve written.

What to do in-between? I DON’T KNOW! I DON’T CARE! I’m not going to think about it.

I’m going to have a party. BECAUSE I WILL HAVE WRITTEN ANOTHER BOOK!

How this keeps happening? I have no idea. Writing a book is such a daunting task. Starting on page one leaves a heavy weight of doubt as to whether it is possible. But writers write.

Fast. Slow.

One word at a time.

Months. Years.

We do it. We push through the doubt and fear.

Because we have stories to share.

It’s a Miracle!

Tags

goals, no more fear, thoughts, word count, writing

It’s a miracle that I finally got to blogging today? Well, yes, that.

But no.

My writing. My sitting on the couch and typing words. Before I began this manuscript, I was scared. I hadn’t written anything new (other than short stories) for years. I had drafts to revise and happily did so, but when it came to staring at a blank page…I panicked.

I knew I could write a book, because I had done so in the past, but the idea was foreign. Weird. HOW DID I DO THIS BEFORE I DON’T KNOW!

But I did it, slowly.

I put no pressure on myself. No word counts to achieve. No judgement if I couldn’t work my way through that transition. No worry about it being crap… dude, that’s what first drafts are.

I kept at it.

And now…I have found myself at a point where the fear has left. I have been writing consistently. My word count rises at a steady pace, not super fast rocket pace, but not too shabby. I do stare at the screen plenty, searching for the next word or scene, but I’m no longer afraid that my brain will let me down.

I’ve accepted how I work best. Instead of screaming at myself all day to write, I let myself have the time to workout, to do all the chores, to know I will get to the words. A bit of balance between all the things has appeared. I have allotted myself reading time and soon I will be adding drawing time, because I miss it. I write best after dinner, even though I do have the document open during the afternoon, the words flow better after the laundry is done, dinner is eaten and the kitchen is clean, when the dog falls asleep (seriously that is important!) and life slows down.

And now I have a crazy mission. To finish this draft before I get into developmental edits for DOORS. Can I do it?

Maybe.

I will do my best.

And for now I will be happy with my little miracle.

 

 

 

Writing Sprints… For Joggers Too!

Tags

fear, goals, new things, sprints, thoughts, Twitter, word count, writing

I’ve been around Twitter for a while. I’ve seen so many people hook up and do writing sprints. And I always thought…how nice, but no way. The pressure must be terrible. They must be watching the clock, wondering how many words they can get…will it be enough words…what if they only get two?

So I never participated, until last night.

I have been having problems putting butt in chair. I don’t always open that word doc. I am easily distracted by snacks, pets, TV, and, heck, I’ll even clean to put off the inevitable typing words that might suck, words that might not make sense, words that might not tell the story lurking in my mind.

Cause that’s really what this procrastination is…fear.

My fear of failure is not a secret. I scream about it at the top of my lungs. So I am working of trying different things to get over it.

Last month I began jotting down my WIP word count at the end of each day, not to reach a certain number, but to see the number go up. I found myself writing so I could write a higher number.

But that wasn’t enough…

Last night, when the fabulous Jolene Haley (go follow her!) asked who was up for sprinting, I said YES before my uncertainty grabbed hold of my brain and pushed me away from the challenge. If I have learned one thing, it’s to MOVE FASTER THAN YOUR FEAR! JUST DO IT!

I didn’t set a word count goal. That would have been too much for me, causing possible meltdown or spontaneous combustion. But I started at the set time and wrote until the end time. I did 250 words in 20 minutes.

I looked at the clock a lot at first, counting down the minutes. I mean how can twenty minutes GO SO FAST? Panic crept in, then I thought of the others in the group who would be back on Twitter to post their results. I thought of how we were all just doing our best and that any new words were good words. And my panic subsided.

I’m not a sprinter. I can’t just write without thinking, writing and writing to add a bajillion words, which is why I don’t NaNo. I stop and think. I stop to check my notes about my characters and worlds.

But I wrote. At my own happy pace.

Second round brought 450 words in 30 minutes.

And…WAIT I HAVE 700 new words?

Then we did 10 more minutes…well, I did 15, because the scene had to be finished and added another 250.

After each round we had a break. After each round we all celebrated each other’s accomplishments, no matter the word count. Goals were reached. Gifs were posted. Friends were made.

My next new thing is to go to the library for an hour during the day to escape the distractions that plague me at home. There’s no eating, laundry, dog who wants to play, or cleaning at the library. As long as I can stay away from ALL THE BOOKS…

If you get stuck, open you eyes to all the possibilities, try things you would normally run from. Scene by scene, chapter by chapter, word by word, we’ll get these things drafted.

I tried something new. And it worked.

And it didn’t kill me, which is most important, because a couple people might miss me.

 

NaNoWriMo Craziness has Begun

Tags

Believe, goals, move forward, NaNoWriMo, possibilities, word count, writing

It’s November!

For writers everywhere that means National Novel Writing Month. People are sitting their butts in their favorite chairs with cups of their favorite beverage in hopes of having 50,000 new words staring from computer screens at the end of these thirty days.

Sound like a lot? Cause it is.

For the last month, I have been reading tweets as those participating prepare. Some create extensive outlines. Others have general plans. A few are just going to wing it. Word counts run rampant on Twitter. Daily goals have been set.

And the fun began last Sunday. I am not a part of the craziness. I do not NaNo.

Why? Too much pressure. With daily goals and the looming deadline of 50K words… I would panic and fail. I know me. This would happen. At the end, I would be a quivering mass of blah with a bunch of words that make no sense. I choose not to be that. My writing process does not allow for this challenge. I’m okay with that.

For everyone who takes on this crazy challenge, I applaud you.

Whether you get to that magic number or not, BRAVO for giving it a go!

It’s been a few days and tweets are positive. Goals are being met. Stories are progressing. The general feeling is upbeat and numbers are high.

This trend probably won’t continue. In a week or so, tweets will begin to show panic. Goals slip away. Doubt nibbles at the positivity. Life throws strangeness into the mix. Exhaustion creeps in. Maybe the story gets out of hand. Suddenly everything that has been written screams that it doesn’t work. Maybe the ms would be better in a different POV or tense.

The questions multiply. The doubt grows. Will what exists at the end of the month be worth having?

YES! IT WILL!

AND I WILL BE HERE TO CHEER YOU ON!

I WILL BE HERE REMINDING YOU THAT YOU ARE…

To get through NaNo, there must be writing. Let the words flow. Maybe you can stick to the plan, maybe not, it won’t matter. Just keep writing. 50K in a month is not achieved through questioning.

You didn’t reach your goal one day? Relax, don’t sweat it.

Put it behind you and keep moving forward. This is not the month to focus on what might have been, what you should have done. This is the time to take what you have and build on it.

No showers for a month? No problem.

Kids are in charge of making their own dinner? They are learning to be independent.

The house becomes covered in a layer of dust? Adds cushion…comfort.

Your family forgets what you look like? They’ll remember eventually.

Because the month will end.

Will you hit that magic 50K number? Maybe. Maybe not.

But you will have words, new words. Words that will always be there for you to mold into whatever they decide they want to be, next week or next year. Whenever.

Hold onto that thought as you type away, reaching for the stars. You are creating possibilities, mixing the clay that will someday be brilliance.

Whether writing goes like this…

or more like this…

Whether you end the day in a state of…

or…

or…

or…

or…

I will be here to tell you to KEEP GOING! I might not be joining you in achieving 50K, but I will be striving to add as many words as I can to my WIP.

So, go forth my NaNo-ers as you NaNo and don’t look back.